Public Speaking

Every time I have to stand in front of a group of people and give a presentation, I always wonder what would happen if I just stood there and purposefully wet myself. It wouldn't be a form of protest nor would it be out of lack of self control. Consider it yet another social experiment. Though I still haven't decided what comes after the purposeful wetting - this is the primary reason why I have yet to do this. See, every action must have a followup plan. Most people only plan up to the act, but rarely think of which appropriate post-plan execution action to take. Thus far, all I have is laugh like an idiot and then proceed to give speech/presentation. But then what? Do I excuse myself from the room? Do I return to my seat and act as if nothing happened? Sure, it'd be warm at first, but then my pants would be cold and itchy - neither of which are good things. And what of the fallout from such an action? Chastised by peers? Reprimanded by supervisor? Worst of all, banished from the cool kids table in the lunch room?

All of this is simply too much to ponder. So when I must give a presentation, I just go to the podium and do it, supposing that the world will never know how to react should I purposefully pee in my pants as I'll likely never do it. That's not to guarantee that one day I won't sneeze and pee my pants or cough and pee my pants...there are endless possibilities to how such an event could unfold. Until then, I'll continue to relieve myself of any nerve pee before a presentation of any sort. But it won't be to prevent accidents - it'll be so the temptation won't be there.