Rants...Mainly Rants

I feel like this past week has been one very strange dream. Labor day sucked. This week...yeah, it sucked. Is it bad that the best day I had this week (not counting Saturdays, those are 'free days') was Friday, when I worked from around 8 in the morning until 10 at night. I now know exactly when the hvac system and lights go off at work.

Friday...I wrote a large portion of the industrial hygiene program for my division. (Industrial hygiene is not a fancy word for maintenance or for personal cleanliness...consider it the art and science of wtf-ology applied to protecting people of invisible hazards floating around in the air. It's a physics and chemistry thing.) I must give myself mad props for being able to create over 5 quasi-involved forms and the procedures for how to use them in a little under 3 hours. I must also give my supervisor mad props for buying us dinner at Carlos O'Kelly's in recognition of our hard work in preparing for our upcoming audit. (Starts tomorrow!) And finally, props go out to Dave Grohl, who apparently moonlights at the Peoria Steak and Shake on War Memorial, for making damn.good.steakburgers and tasty shakes. I love his grilling as much as I love The Colour and the Shape. I also love how the air conditioner in my apartment broke sometime Friday. Nothing like waking up on Saturday morning to find that it's 90 degrees in the abode.

I spent some time talking to Allison while I stood in front of the freezer...well, my head was in it..eating popsicles and only in my underwear. Hot.

...But not as hot as the black initial on the bottom boyshorts, tiny blue stripe sweater and dirty librarian eyeglasses I'm sporting right now.

I gave karoke a try last night at ye olde little bar in Morton. YMCA! Nick and I were supposed to sing 'Free Fallin' after chugging some jaeger bombs, but that song didn't work, so we had to pick a new one. I was supposed to sing 'Like a Virgin' with the two loveliest ladies in the bar, but it all shut down before we had the chance. Oh well - perhaps next time.

And, in what is starting to become a Saturday night ritual, it all ended in LaBamba down by Bradley with the Rev, eating tacos and waxing philosophical. Only we were wearing each other's hats. Sorry man, there's only one person in this world that looks as good in that hat as I do and I don't know where he is these days. It's like he's disappeared off the face of this earth. Where, oh where, have all the good greasers gone?

So our corporate audit starts tomorrow. I'm preparing by downing 3-4 white russians in hopes of knocking myself out. Tomorrow I must kick massive amounts of ass all while feeling sick (and it's not because of the alcohol). But, if I have to be sick in the morning, better this reason than the alternative. And I'm listening to Cake right now too. They make everything good. But of the three person team giving us the once-over, I'm only afraid of 2/3 of them. The corporate ergonomist...we had training together a few weeks ago. If we had gone to college together, I think we would have been drinking buddies.

I bought a new bottle of perfume this weekend. 'Fantasy' by Britney Spears. I can't believe that I would have ever wanted to smell like Britney Spears, but the heady mix of vanilla creme, jasmine, and kiwi was too much to resist.

Plans for this week include: goal of 3 days at the gym, vacuumed carpets, packing for Murray (home sweet home), and spending more time with the Tao Te Ching. While up here, I'm not surrounded by people that draw me back to center, but this text helps. Until then, I'll crawl into bed, close my eyes and feel the warmth of white russian coursing through my veins. And I'll repeat to myself...tomorrow will be great. Tomorrow will be great...