Last Stand at Murray

Just when I thought it was safe to turn off the computer and head off into the sunset...I discovered that I'm going to need to move my apartment hunting excursion up a day. Therefore, here I am - in the shambles that used to be my quasi-organized apartment, borrowing my neighbor's internet and making more phone calls. So, of course, I guess I'll take these few minutes waiting for returned calls to make my final entry from only true 'hometown' I've ever had...Murray, Kentucky.

Hometown is defined as the place where one was born or grew up; the primary place of residence (thanks m-w.com). While I'm certainly "not from 'round here are ye?" I have found that this is indeed the place where I grew up and became the person that I am today. Granted, many of you will argue that I'm probably very much the same person (hopefully actually worthy of your adjectives like hilarious, caring, and genuine - thank you all)... but my entire world view has been altered by being around some of the greatest people I've ever known.

Things I've learned from the collective 'you:'
-To always look for the good in humanity because it is indeed out there. And if I can't immediately find it, go make some of my own.
-There's nothing that can't be fixed with a healthy dose of tequila and mexiranch. If that doesn't work, go buy new underwear. Nothing brings a smile to the face like some new 'whites.'
-There are in fact people who will be there at a moment's notice, regardless of how silly the reason. Whether it be for moral support after a disagreement with the parents or a ride home after a night at the Apple, there are people who will be there no matter what.
-It's worth the time and effort into a place to get the dividends in return. If that doesn't work, invest elsewhere.
-No matter how 'dorky' or 'nerdy' or 'geeky' or 'off center' your interests/talents/passions are, go with it and never be afraid or who you are or aspire to be...there will always be people out there who will love you anyway. And if not, there will always be people even nerdier than you.

As I venture off to Peoria, I leave knowing my three years here haven't been in vain. Well, obviously they haven't because I'm leaving with a BS in Chemistry and a MS in OSH and walking into a position with the word 'senior' in the title at age 24. However, I'm not leaving just knowing how to be a chemist or just how to be an industrial hygienist. I leave here knowing how to tie a toga, do a keg stand, clean up vomit (and not harf while doing it), design and order tshirts, corral 80 women at a time (no small feat), play UT and not get (as) motion sick, set up rudimentary networks, edit video, usher in the Apocolypse, cut someone's hair (at Log Cabin), hide apartment damage as to get the deposit (spackle and Revlon eyeshadow), wear a Level A suit and deal with HazMat situations, storm spot, wrangle small animals, perform minor surgery, and quote Lebowski with the best of them. I've rubbed elbows (and clinked glasses) with Kentucky Department of Labor people. I've been part of organizations given awards for being the best in the country. I've helped take a greek organization on the verge of closing and bring membership numbers close to capacity ('total' for those in the know). I know that if in the next three years, I can do and experience even near as much as I have here, I'll be truly blessed.

So, as I prepare to finish packing and head off to the Land of Lincoln, let me leave you with this message: Life's not going to the be the same without you. I will be keeping in touch. I love you all. Oh, and you've not heard the last of me!



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This Setting Could be Perfect

I'm lying in my bed...which I have transplanted to my living room. The lights are off, the ac is cranked. Everything is illuminated by the nice glow of festive lights and the glow of the television as I watch Pulp Fiction. Computer in my lap, my attention is being held by a force that makes my imagination wander to my (beloved) possibilities, and I bask in what a wonderful moment this is. And all of it is accented with my best bottle of wine. I've been saving it for a special occasion, and tonight, tonight the time is perfect.

This wine... Inside the deep emerald bottle is this wonderous burgundy concoction made of blackberries and blueberries that tickles the tongue and delights the senses.

My ideal paramour would be like this wine: supple and effervescent. With bitter tones counterbalanced by an inherent sweetness. Wise beyond its years. Subtly romantic with brilliant splashes of unexpected zest and insight.

Stream of Consciousness

I want to get in my car and drive...until I'm some place where I have never before set foot. Tomorrow morning, I want to see the sun rise on a brand new horizon.

I do not know you well, yet I wish you were here. If not for anything else, for the way you look at the world.

One of my new aspirations is to live a life marked by clarity and focus.

I want to be a Jedi Knight.

There is now an electricity in the air that has been missing for some time now. It's a wonderful feeling to know that sundown now means misty nights filled with surges of energy and dreams of tomorrow.

Taking sides is never a good thing as the things that happen around us must be viewed as objectively as possible. However, doing so is something that we'll all do at one time or another, if not always on some subconscious level. And it's an odd feeling to realize that you had taken the wrong side. If place in a person's shoes, I would have done the same thing she did.

I've been reading and re-reading a chat transcript over and over because my mind has been sufficiently blown.

What the hell am I going to do when I'm living in a place where I have a bedroom AND and office, not some insane hybrid of them both. Will I be able to sleep at night when I've gone from 2 computers in my room to none at all? My favorite room in college (1007 Murray Place) had everything - desk/working area, the tv/nintendo area, the bed/sleeping area, and a refrigerator stocked with beer next to the bathtub. Few things in life are as nice as kicking it in a sudsy tub of water in a room lit by 'rainforest' candles while sipping an Amber Bock. I know my office will be dark and sleek and filled with interesting artifacts, but my bedroom...where will I even begin with that? It has to be simple, but if it's sparse like my room in Carbondale was, I'll go crazy. Please let me live somewhere that lets me paint the walls...I'm feeling cerulean blue these days.

The Last Strong Hold of Youth

This afternoon, as I went speeding down highway 80, windows down - breeze tangling my hair, blasting Melancholy and the Infinite Sadness, I realized how this week's obsession with youth has been in vain.

I am so glad that I am 24 and not 16 years of age.

"But didn't we have less to worry about at 16 than we do now?"
Well, yes...actually back then the big deal was finding a part time job, gaining the affections of an object of affection, or getting into a preferred college. Now, at 24 there are bills and jobs and real adult issues with which we must deal. But it's okay. Because though we have more responsibility, we have more control over our lives. No longer are we at the mercy of our parents, our allowances, our school administrators. Not only are we the masters of ourselves, we have the means to do what we want - when we want to. The biggest trade off...responsibility for control over one's own life...

So...Many...Boxes

It's a funny thing-stuffing one's life into a box. Though I'm finding that most of the stuff I come across is going into a trash can. It's only evidence, really. Evidence that I've had a pretty good three years here and that there's hope on the horizon that life in Peoria will be pretty good too.

Judging what makes a life "good" can be quite tricky. How is it gauged? For here, the proof is in photographs and stories collected. Late night chats and early morning/post binge-drinking breakfasts. Trinkets bestowed upon me and a box full of letter shirts.

But how will Peoria be judged? Granted, there'll be the monetary aspect and professional accolades, but what will those matter if I can't accumulate 228 phone numbers (for those seeking something quantifiable, but it's grasping at straws because you can't actually put a number on such things) or a bag full of parting gifts and contact information? I'm sure there'll be another box of photographs- me at the ballpark with friends, friends on the river front, going to concerts, fishing, road trips to Chicago, and other forms of (albeit more beneign) debauchery. I'll find a home there, but it will take more time when judged against these last three years.

The Convention Thus Far

Locked out of room via security bar. Louisville Bats Game. Free Beer. Free Beer. Free Beer. Pink argyle sweater. Photo opportunities. More Beer. Felt on Fourth Street. Not knowing that a fellow conventioneer was in one of my classes...this semester. Amaretto sours. Lounge couches. Seeing the same dude that tried to put his hand up my skirt last year scamming on our girls this year too. Good night's sleep. Session on Injury Prevention Programs. Hunting down the person who stole the session sign from my room. Lunch with freaky-deaky salad and chicken covered in beans. Attacked by butter. Session on Workplace Violence Prevention. Formally accepted a job offer from Caterpillar. Called Liberty Mutual and declined their opportunity offer. Exhibitionor's Happy Hour. Wine. Remembering that Chardonay blows. Mini corndogs. Pepperjack Cheese. Wine. Remembering that Pinot Grigio rocks. Acknowledging that eating pepperjack cheese with pinot grigio is rather ghetto, then realizing I don't care. Encounter with alumni and people from "back in the day." Charter bus to Orr Safety Headquarters and Distribution Center. Five minute presentation followed by ten minute tour followed by forty five minutes of beer time followed by a damn good steak followed by rubbing elbows with president, e-board, and owners of Orr Safety. Fourth Street Live! Beer. Beer. Jim and diet Coke (just don't do this ever). Beer. Margarita. Margarita. Someone else's beer. Adorable Romanian Med Students from UK (my love of things eastern european now include vodka, nesting dolls, and some dude named Victor). Doing the hustle to (I'll never call them) cheesy 70s songs with faculty members. Piano Wars at Howl at the Moon. Drawing pictures of the other people at the table. Parrot Beach. Brushing dirt off my shoulders. Vanilla vodka and coke. Vanilla vodka and diet coke. More dancing. Loss of feeling in my hands, feet, and everywhere else. Locked out of my room via security bar...again. FOUR AM!!! Sleeping in my clothes. Mild nausea while taking tickets (is it bad that for about 3 minutes, I contemplated vomiting behind a curtain, but decided 'tis not a good idea?). A better lunch consisting of ceasar salad and high-falutin pot pies (encrusted chicken my arse, it's a pot pie! with one big piece of chicken instead of 'chunked' parts). Taking in the lovely aroma of the country ham storage room. Session on Safety Incentive Programs featuring big, big technical problems. Saving the day by running the presentation off my laptop. Becoming popular when word got out that email could be checked in my room. Drinking purloined cokes (price of coke in vending machine: $2. price of coke from the war room: free)while watching TBS. Updating my blog...

I realized a few things while driving to Louisville tonight:

1. I'm really ready to leave Murray.
2. I need to visit Louisville more often as I rather like the place.
3. I think I left my alarm clock set to go off tomorrow morning.
4. Taco Johns is pretty good, but I'll probably not miss it *that* much.
5. The only way to feel better about a person is to hit them. And then we can be cool again. To one of the people who may read this post...I'm going to hit you, so I stop thinking about how much I want to hit you whenever I see you. So just stand there and take it like a man.
6. Matt B's Meathouse Pizza has been taken for granted far too long. I'm eating a slice every remaining day in Murray.
7. People who write poetry about how much pain there is in the world should just paper cut their wrists open and get it over with.
8. There is no good way to quickly over finding out you've been lied to and then being...accosted by a trusted friend in the same night.
9. I may not be 'special' or 'intriguing,' but dammit, I'm a pretty nifty person.
10. The Arby's at Beaver Dam still stinks.

WKY Parkway, I'll See You in 45 Minutes

Once again, it is time for The Kentucky Governor's Conference on Safety & Health. That glorious time of year when drunken (and some sober) safety professionals gather at the Galt House for a week of safety, networking, and of course debauchery. Now being a seasoned pro at this, I know my biggest forseeable challenge will be the drive to Louisville. My biggest problem with long drives is staying alert, not torturing myself with thoughts (ie - hypothetical zombie attacks, relativity, and thermodynamics gone terriby, terribly wrong), and not harming my precious eardrums with my awful, awful singing. However, I'll keep reminding myself that at the end of that parkway is the road that takes me to the hottest ladies in the world (Hi Allison. Hi Nichole) and all the free drink tickets (thank you KY dept of Labor) I can hold.

Look out Louisville, here I come. It's not much of a vacation, but I'll take it.

This Post Had Balls on It

This article explains everything.

Adventure!

I'm traveling to Peoria for a job interview later today. One thing is for certain: I'll return with a job or I won't. I've resigned myself to letting fate have it's way with me. The only thing for certain is that I'll have some stories to tell when I return and hopefully, people will want to hear them.


This Weekend I've Decided...

- I can pull off cropped pants.
- After cutting off half my hair and making it darker, I have to do a second take in the mirror to recognize myself.
- I have some darned good friends.
- Jaeger gives me the snots.
- The best way to eat a steak is with barehands.
- I should order more things through the mail; I love getting packages!
- The Big Lebowski never gets old,
- But feeling like you have to do a song and dance to be acknowledged does.
- When the power goes out, I still immediately wonder if someone has cut my power and is coming to get me.
- Manicures and pedicures are awesome. I'm going to make this a quasi-routine thing.

Blue

Blue is the color of peace, tranquility, and calm. Blue means stability, harmony, and trust. Blue is the color of trust, confidence, loyalty, and color. Blue is one of my school's colors. Blue is the color of my sorority. Blue is kind of true friend that I am. Blue is the greatest color ever. Blue is the new color scheme of my blog.